Women Impressed By Poker Players… Apparently

Poker players seem to believe their game of choice grants them skills beyond the understanding of mere ordinary men, so we take a look.

We see a lot of strange reports here at Blackjack Champ HQ, we sift the casino gambling news, the new mobile slot reviews, and reports from the wider gambling world that spans the globe and never sleeps. We obviously keep you up to date with the big stories, with developments in blackjack strategy, and with some of the oddities that crop up. We are unashamedly bias in favor of Blackjack, of course, so when Poker decides to make a fool of itself in one of these oddities who are we not to point and laugh for a few minutes?

It would appear that Poker believes that the skills one needs to win at their precious game are the very same as would be required to find, and get this, “the woman of your dreams”, and in an article published in a notable newspaper’s internet arm, it immediately begs the question pertaining to female poker players and their sexual orientation. Can they too only use the skills to attract women? Or will men fall prey to these powers that playing Poker endows? We aren’t told but they do then list the “skills” they believe can be transferred from poker table to romantic success.

The first is patience. Apparently this is a mystical secret known only to poker players, and whilst they do allude to it being a virtue (one for those who have the time) it appears to concentrate specifically in “top players” of texas hold’em, etc. It says this “skill” can be re-purposed by continuing to make advances on women who have already turned you down. Whilst persistence is often valued by women, it’s a fine line between ardency and stalking, and did we really need to know patience was important in human interaction? I think not.

Next up they list decision making, again as if it were a trait solely of those awaiting that final fourth ace on the river. Nothing is more attractive, it then burbles, than a decisive man, going so far to instruct men to simply “Tell them what you want”. Apart from the very obvious dangers of getting one’s face slapped for simply walking up to women and telling them what you want, it’s a tad rich to assume the poker grants players with a better mechanism to make decisions. There are limited odds in poker, it’s a closed game system, women are anything but.

Women Go Crazy For Aggression

Worryingly the next “skill” listed is aggression. Women apparently “go crazy” for aggression in some genetic predisposition towards those more likely to keep them alive. Apparently poker players haven’t evolved as much as the rest of us and don’t understand firearms, the legal system and the fact that aggressive men are cute for a night but their charm wears thin when they get you to pick them up from a police station at 4am still so drunk they call you by someone else’s name. Aggressive gambling is risking big, women tend not to appreciate huge risks but stable sense. See the difference?

In another of their apparent unique skills poker players are imbued with an innate knowledge of something called “control” that allows them to remain adverse to the inclination towards perhaps less than sensible choices or behavior patterns. Demonstrate this control and women will fall at your feet, apparently, although I would suggest a great deal of personal research before you actually attempt to control any woman without her express permission, and even then you might want to get something signed.

The fifth of these skills over which poker players have some weird monopoly in the competition to attract attractive women, is apparently bluffing. They equate bluffing to story telling, it works in poker, you put up a front, telling the story, get the other guy to read you wrong, win the pot, simple. However instructing readers “You need to tell a convincing story” in reference to attracting women sounds just a bit too much like “lie through your teeth if you have to”. Women aren’t too hot on dishonesty and whilst it might just seem like a bluff now, when they bring it up again, it’ll be a lie.

Now for their finale they list “The Stare Down” and claim one needs a poker face. One probably does, when playing poker, but perhaps not the rest of the time, that’s why it’s called a poker face, right? Wrong! They claim that it is when playing poker alone that one can stare into the soul of a women, and that unbelievers should try it in a local fast food outlet. By all means do attempt staring at random women in the coming days, but one wonders what poker players dreams are like if their dream women are in fast food restaurants.

Poking Fun At Poker Players

Now of course all this is just a bit of fun, and we shouldn’t be too harsh on our poker playing friends, but then again we’re impatient, indecisive, passive, lack control, always tell the truth and can’t look you in the face, so we might as well have a giggle at their expense. After all we mere mortals who enjoy our blackjack tournaments should be allowed to titter at this manifestly garbage collection of the obvious or inapplicable. Patience is fine, for example, but its confusion with persistence is practically incitement to self-harm.

We don’t believe your blackjack strategy will help you get the woman of your dreams, the most it can do is win you money. Now at this point it’s awfully tempting to point out that rich men very rarely have issue gaining the women of the dreams, that perhaps there’s some connection between the quantity of money they have and their chances with those women, but one would have to be awfully crass to suggest women like rich men per se. They just prefer them, and frankly, who wouldn’t?

Your casino table manners might not cause much sway in opinion, but these days not being in debt, having some disposable income and, dare we say it, being employed is perhaps going to trump any other considerations in the choices of those ladies you might like. Economic realities might not be the most romantic of considerations however they do enter into it and whilst she might be the stuff of your dreams, are you the stuff of hers?

Poker players seem to believe that an persistently decisive, staring, aggressive, control freak that lies to them all the time is just what women are looking for. Personally, I’m not so sure. I mean certainly there must be some who are looking for just that, but I can’t help thinking they must be few and far between, and finding one might challenge even the most lucky of flush seekers. Blackjack isn’t as romantic, but then you can use a system in blackjack and save your luck not for cards but for love.